


In The Silence (I Hear Your Heart Beating)

by iuckingfdiot



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Coming Out, Getting Together, Howard Stark's A+ Parenting, Love, M/M, Not Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Compliant, Steve Rogers Feels, Steve Rogers Has PTSD, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Tony Stark Needs a Hug
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-04
Updated: 2019-09-04
Packaged: 2020-10-06 18:07:52
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,317
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20511254
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/iuckingfdiot/pseuds/iuckingfdiot
Summary: Tony hated silence, it made his skin crawl and caused the already loud thoughts in his head get excruciatingly louder, buzzing and thumping against his skull.---Steve hated loud sounds, it made him remember the sounds of the war, the bombs, the screaming. It made him want to curl into a ball and just disappear.Who knows, maybe through a little talking and confessions, they can find their harmony.





	In The Silence (I Hear Your Heart Beating)

Tony hated silence, it made his skin crawl and caused the already loud thoughts in his head get excruciatingly louder, buzzing and thumping against his skull. He just chalked it up to being used to the noise. The constant parties and social vendettas he would be forced to go to as a kid. The talking and shaking hands, he was never surrounded by quiet that now he couldn't bear it. Even locked up in his lab he had the constant whirl of devices, sometimes even loud rock and roll thumping against the speakers in his lab. 

Whenever he decided to take a risk and venture out of the lab up to his room and try to sleep, he had JARVIS play white noise while he (attempted) to sleep. Tony wasn't sure if it bothered Pepper if it was another reason why their relationship didn't work. He knew that she didn't like the noise, she had asked him to turn it off while they were together, back then he just agreed and either slept in the lab or not at all. After the Avengers moved in, there was never quiet, it was always busy and wherever he went there was someone there, Clint on the countertop, Steve on the couch, Nat in the gym.

Tony liked it. 

Steve hated loud sounds, it made him remember the sounds of the war, the bombs, the screaming. It made him want to curl into a ball and just disappear. He talked to Sam about it, who responded that it was most likely the PTSD. Those loud sounds brought him right back to when he was covered in his fellow soldier's blood, and the warm feeling of his own blood dripping down his chest from the bullet holes that came from enemy guns.

In truth, Steve just liked the peace that came with silence, he could hear himself think. It wasn't like he hated noise, he liked being around people, but the loud things, concerts, music. God the damn music. That's what bothered him the most. How people can just ruin their eardrums and listen to loud, obnoxious music for hours. He sometimes hung out in Tony's lab, only when he stopped playing that loud music that made Steve have flashbacks to those times. The war times.

Steve had just finished taking a shower, shortly following his workout for the day, (in all he destroyed several sand filled punching bags, over a span of a few minutes, but no one really needed to know that.) 

Steve decided to venture down to Tony's lab, he hadn't come up in a few days and Steve doubted the man had eaten anything. Steve headed for the kitchen on the communal floor, he grabbed some jam and peanut butter and began to make a sandwich for Tony when Natasha walked in.

"Hey Captain," She said nodding her head in his direction. Steve smiled at her in response. "Whatcha doing?" She asked, hopping up onto the counter across where Steve was working on the sandwich. 

"Nothing much," Steve responded shrugging. "Making a sandwich for Tony," He added, before looking to Natasha who had a small grin plastered on her face. "Ah," She replied, lifting an eyebrow. 

"What's that supposed to mean?" Steve asked, putting the completed sandwich on a plate.

"Are you going to tell him how you feel?" She questioned, causing Steve to freeze. 

"Huh?" Steve asked, trying to play dumb. Not only would the team shun him for liking men, but he was the captain and he couldn't get with a member of the team. Could he? No, he wasn't even going to go there, like Tony would feel the same way.

"You like Stark," Natasha stated, looking at Steve with soft eyes.

"No, I don't- I'm not a homosexual or anything," Steve gulped, a slight pink tint growing on his cheeks.

"Steve..." Natasha started, hopping off of the counter taking a step closer to Steve. "You do know it's ok now right? Being gay. Hell, Steve, even I've been with a few women." Natasha put a hand on Steve's shoulder.

"You- it is? Ok, that is?" Steve said his head hanging low. "I think I- I mean- I like men. I mean, but Peggy-" 

"Steve... there are other things other than gay and straight.,

"Oh, because I- can you be both?"

Natasha nodded, "Yeah, it's called bisexual if you like girl and boys,"

"I think I might be that," Steve said smiling a little at Nat. "Is Tony-?"

Natasha chuckled, "Not many people know this but Tony is hella gay, or bisexual I guess cause of Pepper, but anyway I once found him jerking off to a picture of Chris Evans. I sometimes wonder if that's because he looks so much like you,"

Steve blushed and turned around to grab the plate for Tony that he seemed to forget about, but when he turned back to her she was gone. Figures Steve sighed and shook his head, and wondered to the lab. 

When he arrived, the walls of the lab were practically thumping with the loud base of his rock music. Steve closed his eyes briefly, refusing to let the visions of war slide into his mind. He knocked on the door of the lab and when Tony didn't answer, presumably from not hearing him over the music, Steve looked up at the ceiling and asked JARVIS if he would kindly open the door for him. 

When JARVIS did as Steve asked, Steve walked in towards Tony was, when his music erupted in background noise resembling gunshots. Steve imminently started shaking and dropped the plate. The loud crash making Tony turn around at him. Steve dropped to the floor, head in his knees, breathing off and fast. Tony sped towards him, kneeling in front of the man. Steve thought he heard Tony say, "JARVIS off," before Steve was wrapped in a hug with words of "Shhh," and "It's ok," in his ear. 

Steve was there again, gunshots, smoke yelling, he couldn't- Tony? Where was Tony? He looked towards Bucky, "Cap? You ok Cap?" 

"Cap?" Steve opened his eyes hazily and looked at the man in front of him, "That's it big guy, focus on me," Steve blinked and looked at Tony, his face so close to Steve's. Steve kissed him deeply, and Tony let out a shocked "Mmmph!" as he returned Steve's kiss for a short moment before leaning back away from Steve. "Hey, hey Steve. You don't know what you're doing," Tony said grabbing Steve's tear-stained face in his hands. 

"No," Steve said. "I do know. It's you, Tony. It's always been you. I love you, I-, you're the first thing I can think about in the morning and the last thing I can think about before I go to sleep. I spent so long thinking who I was was wrong, but fuck it. The world may disapprove, but you know what Tony. You're my world, my world is only you."

Tony froze then smiled softly, "I love you too, Steve. You need to sleep now, though. Come on, we can talk about this more in the morning." Tony stood up and offered Steve a hand, which the man took. 

Steve followed Tony into his room, "Tony I'm not ready to-"

"No, no Cap. I know. Sometime, but not now. Let's just rest ok? Lord knows we both need it." Tony let out a quick chuckle. 

Steve smiled and took his shirt and jeans off, climbing into Tony's bed. Tony did the same, the bright light of the arc reactor lighting up his room. 

Tony didn't turn on his white- noise that night, he just laid with his head on Steve's chest, turns out the only noise he really needed was Steve's heart, thumping softly as he closed his eyes.

They both got the best sleep they had in a while.

The End.

**Author's Note:**

> Please leave a 'lil love! This story is not beta'd and i worked really hard on it :) DM if you have any prompts!!


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